T O P

2meirl4meirl

2meirl4meirl

MrElliot1210

For some reason, I get that lump throat feeling randomly. Like, I'm not meant to cry in this situation. Maybe I'm just on the verge of having a mental breakdown, but it never gets to happen.


The_Grinface

Happened to me earlier today. No idea why


Hydrauxine

throat tightness is a very common anxiety symptom


D3dshotCalamity

I get it right before a panic attack. Like I'll suddenly feel the need to burst into tears, and get the lump, and then I gotta sit down.


Hydrauxine

your body usually shows emotion before your brain realizes it's feeling said emotion


ThreeQueensReading

I had a major frying breakthrough this year. Was able to cry properly for the first time in almost two decades. Now I've gone the other way. I've gone from "lump in throat" to "sobs at the drop of a hat". 😅 The grass *is* greener, but I'd still like some balance with it all one day.


Unnecessary-Spaces

Major frying breakthrough. Like onion rings and tater tots in the same basket?


turtles6282

Maybe even a couple chicken nuggets


kultureisrandy

It will eventually happen, just need the right amount of stress to flip that switch.


Ovrcast67

I went crazy and started breaking shit around my house


ironic_swag

Yeah, that's probably you having bottled up emotions that you are unaware of and are barely keeping in check


LazyPancake

Hey. Calm down there. I'll stuff shit down as I please, thank you very much.


I-lack-conviction

I’m pretty sure you may be having anxiety


MrElliot1210

I do feel anxious around people. I think it's been called "social anxiety".


8923ns671

Do make time to process/feel emotions? No? You should probably do that before it comes out on its own. Easier said than done, I know. I'm working on it too.


ItsDrWhomever

This is me like all the time 😃 I gotta live with it unfortunately until I get a stable job so I can afford therapy


tom04cz

This has no right being So relatable


MrElliot1210

The fact that so many people relate to this isn't exactly a good sign


LilyBestPokeGirl

Sometimes I get it at the back of my throat if I’m overwhelmed in anger or sorrow, or if I’m just generally sad I get a feeling at the back of my eyes


[deleted]

[удалено]


MrElliot1210

I probably won't, but sure 🤙


SimsAttack

What they say?


MrElliot1210

They just asked to tell me to tell them when I found out


Lo-fidelio

Same


RAINNlevi

thats why i dont watch sad movies now, cuz i feel sad, i feel like crying, i know that the throat pain will go way if i just cry and let it out but i just cant for some reason lol.


ilikebluesocks

*adds lol to make it seem less depressing*


Melee130

Didn’t even notice myself doing this until recently but I do it after every cry for help now lol


the-frog-monarch

It's really a struggle lol


redjonley

You know what fuck you too lol.


heythisisbrandon

I do the opposite. I watch sappy YouTube videos so I can at least feel emotion via other people and let it out sometimes. The sad part is half the time I'm crying because of the video, and the other because I know I'll never have what they have.


Kotoy77

This is basically why im 10% of the anime watcher i used to be. I feel like a starving dog watching a kfc presentation show.


Spudatron

I watched "Man On Fire" with Denzel Washington. That bit at the end.


scraddlebrad92

Your not human if that bit doesnt upset you


Roland1176

That's really the only time that I allow myself to cry a little, I bottle up everything else.


comfort_bot_1962

Don't be sad. Here's a [hug!](https://media.giphy.com/media/3M4NpbLCTxBqU/giphy.gif)


404zach1

I cant watch sad movies anymore because of years of emotional turmoil


comfort_bot_1962

Don't be sad. Here's a [hug!](https://media.giphy.com/media/3M4NpbLCTxBqU/giphy.gif)


ayush77-2000

Bruh


RedditUserexe

That’s not just what happens? I thought that’s what “choked up” meant, you’re physically being choked by the need to cry vs the instinct to not make a scene


Somedoom

I’ve always assumed it meant choking down the emotions to stifle your emotional response 😳


StaleBread_

I had about the phrase “choking up” referring to crying


Brendy_

It is just what happens. It's a completely normal [biological reaction](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.refinery29.com/amp/en-us/lump-in-throat-feeling-crying-globus-pharyngeus) and you may as well say "Getting a dry throat when you're thirsty means you're emotionally repressed."


rockonhomieg

non-AMP link: https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/lump-in-throat-feeling-crying-globus-pharyngeus also.. did you read the whole thing? cause it says: The medical term for a lump in your throat is "globus pharyngeus," says Christopher Chang, MD, an otolaryngologist in Warrenton, VA. "The lump sensation is due to a muscle tightening up when sadness is being suppressed," he says. that reads to me exactly as fighting back crying to avoid causing a scene.


ruckusrox

did you read the whole thing? “Whether you're openly happy crying watching Tv or trying to keep it together while someone delivers sad news….. this lump-in-the-throat feeling is normal, and not something you should fight. The medical term for a lump in your throat is "globus pharyngeus," says Christopher Chang, MD, an otolaryngologist in Warrenton, VA. "The lump sensation is due to a muscle tightening up when sadness is being suppressed," …. For most people, the lump and tightness goes away as they start to cry. But sometimes, during periods of extreme stress (like while going through a breakup or studying for final exams), people report feeling a lump in their throat that lasts for weeks, he says.”


kekangyal

This doesn't seem to contradict what they wrote.


ruckusrox

It happens if you hold back a cry, before you cry, if you cry too long. Its just a part of the muscles you use. They just isolated the suppression part of the article


kekangyal

Even in your quote: "The lump sensation is due to a muscle tightening up **when sadness is being suppressed**".


ruckusrox

Yes but not exclusively. This article explains it in a bit more detail on what the muscles are doing :) “Normally, when you aren’t crying, your glottis opens and closes when you swallow all day long. This ensures that food and spit go one way and air goes the other, with no mix-ups in between. But, when you cry or are on the verge of crying, your glottis is trying to stay open, but gets forced close every time you swallow. This tension messes with the muscles in your throat, giving the sensation of a lump.” https://www.sciencealert.com/why-do-we-get-a-lump-in-our-throats-when-we-re-sad


kekangyal

Maybe the "on the verge of crying" is the key here. The last few years when I cried, I didn't have any lump, neither before when I was alone. When I had the urge of crying, I cried, I wasn't on the verge of crying if it makes any sense to you like this. Edit: so if you don't let yourself to cry for so long that you have to swallow between the urge to cry and the cry itself, I think that means you suppress it.


ruckusrox

Ya makes sense. I get it MOST times i cry. But it happens EVERY time i am holding it back. It would probably be more straining to suppress and not release because maybe its like flexing really hard without a full motion? I dunno but it can also happen if you cry without holding anything back. And especially if you are really not holding back, if i cry too long i could have a strained lumpy throat for a few days, :) but its definitely not a tell tale sign of being emotionally repressed . Its very normal


geraldisking

I’m a guy, even now I can’t cry. I feel nothing most of the time.


TeeDeeEff

I feel like the most genuine emotion I feel is love for others. Deep, bareback admiration and awe of how good some people truly are. My brain uses it as a measuring stick to show me how fucking worthless I am.


itsamedavide

Jesus Christ, give me a head up before smashing me like that


squishpitcher

“bareback admiration” made me chuckle. see? you have things to contribute and create joy.


cheese_m23

Top ten most hurtful callout posts


ironic_swag

I feel like an NPC


geraldisking

Here, go give gold to someone else. You are not worthless.


unholy_abomination

You mean there are other emotions besides "danger" and "standby"?


jumbodaddystack

Anger and drinking.


darwinian_ape

Take care stranger


Ilignus

I've started to feel this so hard over the last year. I don't think that I'm worthless though, and neither should you. I got choked up at the end of The Bad Batch, and I'm a 30 year old man. So many other things though, too. Therapy does a number on you in a positive/somber way.


Nanashi-74

Same but it isn't love, because that would be too good of me. It's envy, always envy.


No_Lawfulness_2998

Same here.


TheRealCCHD

The hugz award is all I can give, but I feel it's the most fitting one... I feel you bro


Strolltheroll

You’re not worthless. You’re human and we’re all trying to figure it out. If you need somebody to talk to always feel free to msg.


tom04cz

You did not have to call me out like that dude


Crabbagio

Yoooo, I know the feeling. It's especially fun because I know I FEEL emotions. But outside of anger and happiness I don't ever truly know what the emotion is? And so I end up expressing most emotions with either anger or complete apathy. Thankfully I'm at least good at recognizing that my anger isn't usually actually anger, and more just anger at the fact I'm too emotionally retarded to know what I'm feeling. So I at least never get truly belligerent, just quiet and distant.


ListenwhatIsayoo

It’s called alexithymia


Crabbagio

I didn't even know there was a word for it lmao Thanks for the information, friend.


Substantial-Essay202

I’m in this post and I don’t like it.


xenon129

The closest I can get to crying is this pressure that builds up behind my eyes. It's like I want to let tears out, but I can't.


SwiftLawnClippings

Same


Binary_Omlet

I just got back from the vet with my cat and 99% sure it's cancer due to how fast and aggressive it is the tumor on her cheek is. She lost her eye on that side already. Recommended euthanasia. Getting pain meds and antibiotics to ease her atm. Maybe a month if lucky. I'm so angry and frustrated and scared for her, and I feel the urge to bawl my eyes out but it won't fucking come.


unholy_abomination

My psychiatrist keeps asking me if such-and-such SSRI works any better than the last three and I'm like, "Yeah idk, none of these actually make me *feel* any different... all I can tell you is that I changed my sheets for the first time in like 6 months."


cbellk

I'm like this. It's hard for me to cry. I get teary every now and then, but rarely cry. And when I have cried it almost feels forced. Like I'm just making myself cry and not doing it naturally? Feels weird.


MT_SLAETTARATINDUR

Is it because you are not safe enough? I say this because I can only cry in the shower where I can be as loud as possible. When I cry I sound like a wounded beast and feel slightly relieved after that.


Azrai113

Oh gods. I'm a shower cryer too. "Oops got soap in my eyes again" ....for the third time today....


MT_SLAETTARATINDUR

guy here too i just punch things until enough pain has accumulated to cry lol


mneff5514

this is true even shit that fucks me up i still just.. can’t cry


adaam_93

Except a deep, unyielding, sense of anxiety and dread.


rasterbated

Reading about childhood emotional neglect changed my life. The way we’re raised as boys, virtually every one of us suffers from it in some way. Your parents don’t teach you how to deal with emotions, or denigrate you for having them (“boys don’t cry” et al) so you gradually learn they’re bad and do your very best to shut them off. The emotions don’t go anywhere, tho. They just build up inside. It often leads to exactly the lack of feeling you’re describing, combined with a deep, constant sense of unease and rare but explosive emotional outbursts. The book I read is called “Running on Empty” if you want to check it out for yourself. I cannot recommend it more strongly.


Bleezze

I've cried earlier today and also yesterday. I cry all the time whenever I watch tv-shows/movies. Barely has to be sad to be enough to make me cry


Ovrcast67

nice rhyme


junk_mail_haver

You can cry dude.


Bigtiddytinyballman

Not that easy, dude


chimerauprising

Some people just can't. Something snapped while growing up due to trauma and I just can't cry anymore. Trust me, I've been trying for years. Crying would help me manage my stress and anxiety. I wish I was normal.


LazyBea07

Does everyone not get that lump/pain in the back of their throat before they cry??? Like crying is kinda painful tbh


Nightrider1861

They do. This post just kinda overanalyzes a normal thing and makes it seem like you're emotionally repressed.


the-frog-monarch

lump--> cry = not repressed lump--> no cry = repressed


Boner4SCP106

It worked really well, too. Check the top comments. They're wallowing in it.


kekangyal

Not always. It hasn't been painful for me for years, basically since I started to get better emotionally. And before that it wasn't painful when I was alone, only when someone was there, so I thought I shouldn't cry.


Skittle_kittle

I honestly don’t know what any of you are talking about, I genuinely don’t know what the lump feels like. I cry maybe twice a month for various reasons, and I do cry at sad movies. I’ve always heard the term but I cannot relate, I don’t know that it feels like to feel a lump in my throat when I’m sad. My eyes tingle and sting when I try to repress crying, is that something you all have?


Prisoner_L17L6363

After a traumatic event in 2013, I've been completely incapable of crying. Like, I was a huge crybaby before then, but ever since that event I've been seemingly physically incapable of crying. It's like I've got a blockage or something, idk. Kinda the same thing as this post, too


MarsScully

Kind of the opposite happened to me. I was allowed and encouraged to express myself, but I just… didn’t. I was very stoic and didn’t really cry for most of my life, and then a couple of tragic events made me start crying at things. It still takes me a lot of effort and don’t really know how to do it, but the choking up comes a lot more often these days. Also, I’m really sorry about whatever it was that happened to you. I hope you can heal someday <3


69_420_girl

What event tho?


Prisoner_L17L6363

A combination of losing a family member, and being abused. Kinda personal, so I'd rather keep it there, thanks


69_420_girl

Undertand, wish u best


Prisoner_L17L6363

Thanks man, and good luck with whatever you need it for


69_420_girl

Thanks man, stay safe


pandashallfly

Holy shit exact same thing happened to me except in 2017-2019. Hope you get over your blockage. I’m working on it through brainspotting but its not easy to unblock something that has ingrained itself so deeply. Wish you the best


browsing4stuff

I feel like I expressed so much as a child I no longer have the ability to cry.


keera-lalala

Relate and you're my hair twin!


browsing4stuff

Yeeeee


PSI_duck

I’ve found the ability to cry again after lots of “practice.” While I love to give emotional support to others I can’t cry in front of others even after months of therapy and ‘finding’ myself. Guess I’m just waiting for someone to give me love support and acceptance. It is possible to climb out of the hole! Never give up, because the alternative is much worse.


properu

Beep boop -- this looks like a screenshot of a tweet! Let me grab a [link to the tweet](https://twitter.com/witchashtyn/status/1432100169999323139) for ya :) ^(Twitter Screenshot Bot)


comfort_bot_1962

:D


comfort_bot_1962

:D


Flopolopagus

Heh, yeah.. (•_•)


The-Gerber-Baby

I do this but I was allowed to express emotions? Like I haven’t cried in a long while and whenever I do it’s over something stupid, like losing to the kingsmould in the path of pain in hollow knight


PencilFetish

Ayy, thank god I'm not the only person who's shed tears over that game-


BlueCulprit

Life is suffering :(


darlingbabyslut

i am BEGGING y’all to stop pathologizing every single thing to ever exist. The pain in your throat before you cry is called the Glottis Sensation and it’s a completely normal physiological response. it has nothing to do with your childhood 😭


PlushiePizza4488

True but people will take any chance they get to vent (including me lmfao)


Zenketski

I get the pain. But my parents were 17 and 18 when I was born so it's not really their fault. If I had a kid at that age I probably would have abandoned them in front of a fire department. Or just offed myself lol


jimmymcpantsreturns

Oof


ThePeopleOnTheCouch

I feel called out.


Skelletonwolf

i don’t think that lump or pain is a big deal, i mean i feel it most of the time i have to cry?


dark_hypernova

Whenever I cried as a kid, my dad would beat me with his belt because "men don't cry".


House1219

So sorry. That’s just wrong.


KRAIGIER1974

W8 w8 w8. Not everyone get's that feeling in the back of their throat when they need to cry?


legolili

Literally everyone. Hormonal response forcing your glottis open for increased air intake, since your body is interpreting strong emotion as the need for a fight or flight response. Zero to do with childhood trauma lol.


millennium-popsicle

I have lost the ability to cry. But hey, I can reason my way out of every emotion.


A550l3

Just got out of a relaitionship and i cant even fucking cry about it, god i hate existing


PlushiePizza4488

Express emotions? What's that? O.O When I get angry /sad/anxious/ any negative emotion ever i just go numb cause it's not acceptable to be anything but happy infront of my parents :) any other emotion is crocodiles tears worth of bs and a tantrum I'm throwing to disrespect them :) Life is good guys


leeman27534

i barely even feel emotions. it's just this sort of crushing emptiness pulling me down ever deeper


House1219

Can you talk to anyone?


leeman27534

probably. not likely to happen.


House1219

Can I ask why? Sorry if that’s a lot.


leeman27534

sure, i don't care. to both, you can ask, and it's the answer. talking to people doesn't really help everyone, i'm antisocial so i don't really want to go around talking to people anyway, more often than not, they actually don't fucking care and are either just being polite, feeling put upon, or they do care, and now they're concerned for your mental well being but can do fuck all to help you AND now they're upset i'm also not really looking to 'get better' at this point. i don't care. i'm just trying to get to the end of this bullshit with as little additional bullshit in my life, because it's just not worth it. i've been in therapy half my fucking life, hsn't helped my depression one iota. ​ also, as an aside, this isn't really the place for this. it's a meme site for depression memes. it's more the sort of go 'yeah, relateable' and move on. people here aren't looking for a sympathetic ear or anything, it's all just a waste of time so you're less focused on your own mind. it's not a crisis center ish thing, it's just an escapism.


House1219

I was just asking. Didn’t mean to upset you. Sorry, and may you find some peace unlooked for. I need it too.


leeman27534

you didn't upset me, dood.


L4ND0NL33

Whenever I need to cry, I just yawn and it goes away


Superstep7988

Uh neither cuz I can’t cry


SeveralSmalMouses

For me it's more I never feel anything, just satisfaction/disappointment on how my art piece turned out


Not_a_brazilian_spy

When I was younger, I couldn't cry, but I thought it was just overrated. Like, why would I ever cry? Being not able to do it isn't a great problem. Ooh boy, I was so very wrong


r4dbunny99

This hit home


ShortNefariousness2

I was, but I'm a boy, so got it anyway.


Andrewrost

Wait people feel happy as an emotion? My emotions I feel are angry/agitated, sad, and RARELY, excited? But that last one could be anxiety too.


comfort_bot_1962

Don't be sad. Here's a [hug!](https://media.giphy.com/media/3M4NpbLCTxBqU/giphy.gif)


comfort_bot_1962

Don't be sad. Here's a [hug!](https://media.giphy.com/media/3M4NpbLCTxBqU/giphy.gif)


forgotmyaccountT-T

God damn it


forgotmyaccountT-T

Honestly I don't even get the lump anymore I just kinda go dead.


essentially_gone

Pretty sure that’s just a natural side effect of having to cry, not some sign of childhood repression.


eball72

Is that what that is? I can't even cry when I want to.


HIsince84

Sometimes I think I have strep or a tonsil stone but I’m just really angry and sad at the same time.


StellarSong

u/CappuccinoDude


Cappuccinodude

Hmmkkkkkkk


cateanne

you didn’t really need to call me out like that but aiight


ohpandapuffs

Wow this brought back memories I didn’t want to relive. I still get that feeling though, just not as much anymore. Guess that’s a good thing


SMGuinea

Is that... not supposed to happen?


RTheNaive

Yo... what did I ever do to you to get called out like this? My back throat pain is mine 😑


Indian_FireFly

:p oops


GobiPLX

Wait, that pain isn't normal to all people?


asherino66

wait you mean to tell me that pain in my throat when im about to cry isn't normal?


tnuke1

IT ISN'T NORMAL?


legolili

Ascribing an utterly normal biological function to "mY tRaUmA". Classic social media. Heightened emotion gets interpreted by your body as the need for a fight-or-flight response. The hormones that come with this work to open your glottis wide to maximise oxygen intake. When you swallow in this state, you're feeling pressure on your glottis that isn't usually there. But no, it's because your parents were mean to you. Or too nice to you? Or indifferent to you. Whichever thing you're choosing to blame your failings on today.


arealdent

This strikes Me to a corner, I thought I knew but damn, I'm sorry that others feel this way too.


seeet2

I was allowed to "go fuck yourself" when I was in pain/need.


TheNachmar

I know emotions, it's how we call and calculate the movement of multiple electrons


OppositeTechnical902

I was not allowed to express emotions. I'm almost 40 and a women and I still can't cry.


cwebldweb

My parents don't care if I cry or not but somehow I got it in my head that I shouldn't and now I can't. I'm doing perfectly fine. Pretty sure


LuvsToSpooge13

I feel somehow attacked. What happened to my younger self?


seaward_bound

And it's a loop... When you feel it you get frustrated because of it, which makes you want to cry more...


Turbulent-Island-570

But when happy, too. Like, can’t hardly give a compliment without the lump…


comfort_bot_1962

Hope you do well!


I-lack-conviction

Technically I was told I could but than shit on for doing it, so lumb. Lord of the rings helps, no joke.


bitb00m

Shit, that's what that is???


all_knowing_john

Hello, my name is John and I am All knowing Ask me anything and I'll answer


Epikgamer332

This sub just got more real than usual


Raynestorm3

Damn… and here I thought that was normal..


GigglegirlHappy

I was allowed to I just wanted to be a tough kid. Now I regret


anthem__

I feel that all the time. If I cried, I was called a crybaby. But if I didn’t, I was called heartless. So I learned to embrace my “heartless” nature on the outside, but cry in silence and when I was alone.


WolfofDunwall

I’m an adult and I still can’t express emotion among family.


ElTioRata

There was a time in my childhood and teenage when I'd cry a lot. Now I no longer do it, and I actually prefer it that way because I hate that when I'm crying my eyes starts hurting.


123Spaghetti321

Sometimes i get these odd sniffles randomly. Like, when you are crying and the way you breath isnt very straight


unholy_abomination

I'm a grown-ass adult and literally *just* starting to wonder for the first time if maybe it wasn't kinda fucked up that my dad terrorized me for most of high school and once smacked the shit out of me because I had the audacity to accidentally block his hand on reflex....


MacTheReject

Oh this one hurts


sebspeed6

I cry like twice a week but not in front of people. Crying good for clearing the mind but I want to seem strong and stoic to others. Us men often go too far in emotional suppression especially with depression.


Fun_Description_5763

Or your inner voice tell you that you are a lil bitch and weak PS if you even think about crying So you masturbate


AshNics6214

Yup. But not bc of my family or anything. I personally just don’t like to cry.


ShrekSuperSlamForDS

Y'all too accurate on this board


ironic_swag

I wasn't allowed to get hugs as a child


ProfHatecraft

That second one. I learned pretty early on to hide my emotions, that my parents viewed them as a burden.


DribbleMeTimbers

I was allowed to express my feelings but I didn't cause I didn't want people to know


Yanko_reddit

fuck off


Secure-Imagination11

When I was younger I cried when I was frustrated most of the time to the point where I stopped being comforted. Know what stops you from crying? Bite your tongue. Hard.


f-J-Adames

Pain in the back of the throat definitely


legolili

Also if you get a pain in your elbow when you hit your elbow it means your second grade teacher was emotionally distant and you need a therapist ASAP


Dog-Cop

I cry like a baby and still get that choked up feeling. It’s totally valid way to express your feelings, as much as crying, means your just as emotional as anybody


spacestationkru

I used to. It had been nearly ten years since I could remember the last time I had cried, but then I played a particularly emotional videogame in 2016 and it absolutely crushed me (Life is Strange for anybody curious). Now I cry for just about any reason. Very often for no reason at all.


--ikindahatereddit--

*exactly* that feeling in the back of my throat


Taeyx

wait is that not part of crying for everyone?