T O P

Dating Life

Dating Life

proudream

Sounds like it could be anxious-avoidant attachment style? Just a possibility. Look it up


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Wooah that’s crazy I’ve actually just started learning about the different types of attachment at Uni and I never realised it about myself but you might be right. I wonder if it would be possible to break something so deeply engrained in me..


xfearless_wanderer

You're spot on! I'm a mix of anxious avoidant and anxious preoccupied, confirmed by my therapist. It sucks but I'm working on it.


rainbowfoxtrot

Yeah this happens to me too. The only person it hasn’t happened with is my partner I’ve been with for eleven years. I use to think it was because I had commitment issues, but after meeting my partner I realized it was just that none of those people were right for me and that’s why I would get uncomfortable and bail. I honestly feel it’s a bit of a superpower we have. Imagine how many years people waste being in relationships that aren’t healthy or making them happy.


pewpewchew02

I very much relate to this, and it really comforts me to see others felt this way. Everyone I have been with in the past really was just not for me.


MoodyEncounter

dude same, now we’ve been together for 4.5 years and I still legit love hanging out with him every day. bananas.


rainbowfoxtrot

I feel you. My guy is my favorite person ever.


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Oh my gosh I love thinking about it like a superpower!! I’ve always felt down on myself about my inability to stick things out with someone but yeah maybe it’s just because my subconscious knows I haven’t met the right person


rainbowfoxtrot

I use to be hard on myself too, but now I’m super grateful for it.


Lilfoot_96

I think you guys just need a partner that will treat you like a house cat: when you want cuddles and kisses give it to you, and when you act all aloof, give you space.


Interesting-Echo-566

Exactly. Us Aquarians are just alien cats.


babybellasfeet

As an Aquarius either I’m really into you or I’m not. Sadly no in between.


pikapika0418

I often find myself choosing between two people, and I’m very indecisive. I think too much about each person’s good sides, and can’t go with one. And that’s how I’m still single


Ok_Aardvark_6047

I am in the same situation currently. I am trying to be with both of them, you know same household and everything. They both mean the same to me scared if I choose I'll cheat on one of them with the other.


SaintPepsiCola

Yes alllllll the time. You can say that I’m a player because of how much into them I am and then I’m not ( like air ). It’s not intentional though


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Yes!! And I hate the thought that some people might think I’m just screwing them around for the fun of it when it’s actually unintentional


GrumpyPidgeon

I’m a heavy Gemini, but what works well between me and my Aqua wife is that we love being together but also love our space. When she’s not here, I miss her but my mind immediately shifts to projects and other stuff I’m working on. She misses me too, but wouldn’t miss me if she felt even a little bit like I was clingy or she needed to be there for my sake. We also ghost each other on text all the time and don’t think anything of it. One of my best friends is a Cancer sun Scorpio ascending and the ghosting irritates her.


lostmywallet72

Cancer sun, Scorpio rising here. I was seeing a aqua girl for 4 months ish and she did the ghosting thing out of nowhere and then tried to hit me up weeks later. Yeah that doesn’t slide with us lol, ghost and we not letting people back 🤷‍♂️


GrumpyPidgeon

Can I apologize on her behalf? It’s nothing personal, I promise! We’re just quirky.


lostmywallet72

It’s okay! No hard feelings with you guys, I actually like Aquarius’s a lot and get a long with them, just the romantic side is not good for a cancer as y’all are super detached. Trying to talk about emotions with an Aquarius just doesn’t happen haha


RepresentativeNo6811

definitely I find myself in those situations, and theres no in between... Im into you or Im not and Im just too friendly with you and I love to talk a lot, but no emotional feelings whatsoever.. like at the beginning I usually feel good about it and Im building up emotions for you, but all of a sudden something happens and I switch and I feel uncomfy...


Unlikely_Fly_5683

Is it when they try to get too close, that you switch off?


RepresentativeNo6811

yes, but it depends on the situation.. usually If I need to maintain the conversation with someone bcause you dont talk too much, or you are retractive & you are not that active as I am, and no positive feedback from you... then I switch off. I hate forcing things... I hate the habitual things in relationships, we are together because we want to, bcause we talk, we understand each other, we enjoy being next to each other and this does not need to be explained and justified


RepresentativeNo6811

I mean its not a bad thing that you are wanting to be closer, just let me accept it.. dont force it; let things happen on their own


Unlikely_Fly_5683

Do you communicate that?


RepresentativeNo6811

good question, bcause I never tell it to my partner, and I dont even indicate that, bcause that would be forcing things, I wont force you to do something the way I like


RepresentativeNo6811

believe me, If you give me time.. you give me chance to develop my feelings for you, and believe me aint nobody loveing you more than me If you give me the chance, the time.. just dont force things, dont ask me about my purpose with you.. or my plan with you.. bcause it might be a switch off.. we dont plan, we are living in the flow. we need more space bcause that is the freedom we are like to be in.. if we have freedom we have everything, and we love it, we will be loveing you as much as we can.. bcause you are giving us everything, the rights. I hope u understand. I mean I never had bad sex, bcause I never force it, so its all about feelings everytime...


Unlikely_Fly_5683

I understand and wish I had know before I walked away from am Aqua after 10 months because he would not give more. Miss him.


RepresentativeNo6811

theres one sentence to make all aquas fall in love.. Im still waiting for a girl to show up in my life, if she would be saying this: "- so are you still here, or you are finally gone and doing whatever the fuck you want today? because I want to miss you so hard bcause of it... and believe me, I will.. very much" if you are saying this to me.. then Im going shopping, and Im gonna find the biggest, most beautiful fuckin ring ever for you


Unlikely_Fly_5683

You mean just be ok with you doing what you want so she can miss you?


Unlikely_Fly_5683

I guess that is where I am at lol


52groova

No worries..I totally understand and people are weirdos .. be patient single Aqua if you seek love...love will find you.. 🛸


datonebrownguy

Im 31/male and yes this happens to me too. Just last night I was gonna go for a booty call, she kept telling me to send me dick pics and said I better be hairy and not to shower. I was like uhh ya I'm actually I'm tired now good night! I probably should've been honest but those were pretty weird requests, I mean I see a lot of girls complaining about unsolicited dick pics but this girl really wanted one but the weirdest part was not to shower hahahaha


K0nadolomite

I actually think the no shower thing was NOT weird😳


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Oh my god nooooo you gotta shower hahahaha


LULULuciano

Totally depends. But booty call shower yes. But someone I’m with. I like the smell of them. Their...smell. Not deodorant or cologne. Their undersmell


K0nadolomite

Exactly this. I like my men natural and the smell that comes with that like on the back of their neck. Especially if the guy comes home with dirt on his hands and sweat on his back from working hard all day. I’m guessing this girl probably felt the same way. Anyways, I’m kind of surprised at the unreceptive response towards weird requests...and the downvotes to my response...are y’all sure you’re in the right zodiac sub lol


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Oh wait wait I agree with the natural scent and musk thing!! But booty call or new person I’d hope they were clean.. at least their dick was ahah.


K0nadolomite

Lol ok ok truuuuuuue


u_dt_know_me

im just 17 and had 2 crushes (not at the same time) before and apparently both liked me (not at the same time ofc) and once they confessed, i started avoiding them and thinking this just isnt the right thing lol i thought i had a problem or something


Andrewfairlane

Yes. This happens usually after 6-1 year for me without fail every every every time I date someone. It’s almost overnight too.


MoodyEncounter

this is meeeee. it’s not the aqua thing, it’s a type of negative attachment called anxious-avoidant attachment. it could also perhaps signal to some alignment of ace sexuality (there’s a spectrum) — aromantic, asexual, etc. do a deep dive into yourself and see what might be causing this sort of reaction. you will absolutely get to a happy place with a little reflective work. ✨


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

Definitely going to look into this a bit more, I thought I knew myself pretty well but sometimes things come up and my reactions surprise me! Reflecting on oneself is easier said than done though isn’t it?


astroaquarian13

I agree with some of the other people. In general, I’m usually all in or all out. I’m either interested or not interested at all. I was extremelyyyyyyy nervous to meet up with the guy I’m seeing now but I was interested and followed through with seeing him. A lot of people mentioned attachment styles. I know I have a fearful avoidant attachment style. I also want to get close to someone emotionally but I could see myself freaking out if it actually happened. I have abandonment issues so it’s scary for me to think someone may actually get to know me (the good, the bad and the ugly) and say “yeah this is to much for me, I’m gonna leave.” Because I’m avoidant, I usually find a reason to leave before the other person to avoid feeling like I’ve been left.


Severe-Wrongdoer-123

I found that in my last relationship if there was any sort of conflict or if I didn’t agree with something it would make me fear that he would leave me and I realised I was subconsciously pushing him away because I didn’t want to “prolong the inevitable”


astroaquarian13

I 100% did the same thing, except it was subconscious. But with my ex, that was his thing. If I didn’t agree with him or do what he wanted me to do, he would leave. It was very unhealthy. My situation now is complicated but I will say, we’re generally on the same page about most things. Even if we’re not, it’s easy to agree to disagree with him and move forward.